Don’t say the F-word
Failing at something does not make you a failure.
In researching this piece I’ve read a lot of articles telling you that failure boosts your empathy, makes you humble, makes you stronger, more resilient, it’s motivating. On the flip side there’s a whole library-full of articles about why failure simply isn’t an option and how, if you do fail, it’s down to your mindset and you alone can fix it. Whether you sink or swim depends on nothing more and nothing less than your own drive to success.
So the conversation becomes very black and white - failure is either a taboo and not even part of the equation, or it’s glossed over as a solely positive experience - what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger, dust yourself down and move on. It’s the hustle mentality, move fast and break things.
Well, be careful not to break yourself.
Business failure and the feelings that accompany it are complex, nuanced and resist any oversimplified formula. Being real, no one likes to fail, and there’s plenty of reasons why. Failure doesn’t feel good, and it often costs a sizable chunk of money, time, and dignity. On top of that, comebacks are exhausting.
Failure works on both an emotional, internalised level and a very tangible, external level.
If a business venture doesn’t work out, you’ll feel it acutely personally.
You can feel like a failure whether or not you actually do anything. The classic failure to launch scenario is where you self-sabotage because of the fear of failure rather than any actual, factual failure. The failure is entirely internalised because you never took action in the first place. And where you have started and run a business that hasn’t flourished, it’s your baby that hasn’t worked out. You have an emotional connection to the concept that simply doesn’t exist if you are an employee at someone else’s company.
If you do launch your own company and for whatever reason it doesn’t last, many founders feel foolish or embarrassed in front of their peers because what failed is made public - whatever feelings of disappointment or stress you might have associated with the experience are compounded by worries of how you might be viewed by others.
A report by the social entrepreneur incubator UnLtd “Exploring: Social entrepreneurs and failure” points out, the most obvious type of failure is the closure of a business but there are so many other metrics you could be measured against - whether you’re judging yourself or the judgement comes from others. It could be that you’re not hitting your revenue targets, or the impact you’re seeking to have isn’t bearing fruit. The feeling of failure can creep in under many guises - not just the most obvious ones.
When failure is only ever celebrated as a learning experience it negates the tangible and potentially life changing knock on effects. If you have invested significant personal savings into your project, how much have you lost? The financial implications materially impact quality of life and living standards. Rent is still due, mortgages still need to be paid and there still needs to be food in the fridge. There could be spillover into your significant relationships whether that’s marriage, family or friendships. Stress and disappointment to do funny things to even the tightest of bonds.
Your response to business failure will be conditioned by the personal stakes involved.
Do you have financial support or a strong community network? Are you going it alone with a financial buffer behind you, or are you relying on the money you are hoping to make? Put simply - are you in a position to fail comfortably?? As Louise Nicolson puts it in The Entrepreneurial Myth “There is a difference between those who are entrepreneurs through necessity and those who chase a specific opportunity. An economic push into entrepreneurship versus the pull of an opportunistic vision…”. She also points out that “Fail often: fail better is a mantra for the privileged” .
The shiny instagram culture of remaining positive at all times is largely unhelpful.
A participant in the UnLtd report put it perfectly when they said “the difficulty of being trendy about it is that it just makes me feel so crap… it becomes about me and my own response to it.” Often “being trendy” means putting a brave face on something unbearably painful. It also dismisses any discussion of the externalities.
Success isn’t entirely down to your will to succeed. A huge part of it is circumstance and luck. The Centre for Entrepreneurs spells it out when they say “entrepreneurs are more affected by external barriers (such as time constraints and a lack of funds) than internal ones (….knowledge, inexperience and fear of failure).“ Taking the most obvious example I can think of - imagine opening a shop at the end of February 2020. You might have done some nifty footwork and pivoted online, or you might have been too leveraged to pay back the loans you’d taken out based on forecasts made before anyone had ever heard of Wuhan. In the latter example your new business would likely have folded due to circumstances entirely out of your control. Looking at failure needs critical discussion and analysis rather than a celebration.
Failure and it’s ripple effects are huge topics to cover but I think important considerations include acknowledgement, analysis and learnings. I’ve tried to compile 3 pointers for each in a brief but hopefully useful framework.
3 things we should acknowledge about business failure:
It happens
It’s nothing to be ashamed of
It sucks
3 things we should analyse about business failure:
What failed? Was it the concept/ product? Was it a lack of strategic planning? Was it circumstantial?
What has been lost? Reputation? Money? Confidence?
Is it worth trying again? Were you bringing a particular product to the market or launching your own business based on the desire to be independent?
3 things we could learn from business failure:
For some people it is a growth opportunity that informs the process of trying again
For other people it scratches an itch that needed scratching because you don’t know until you try something
Entrepreneurship isn’t for everyone - it might be the zeitgeist and seem very appealing but the reality might not measure up to expectation
What are the most important lessons you’ve learned from your time in business? Do you have a different opinion on the meaning or value of failure? How can I support you if this is something you’re dealing with right now? As always I’d love to hear from you.
Goodmakers Society regularly run their Mission Possible . It’s designed to help business owners face problems through innovation, collaboration and creative thinking. It highlights the value of Plans B, C and D if Plan A doesn’t make the cut - focusing not on success at any price but practical solutions to business difficulties. This is a recommendation, NOT an ad - Goodmakers and 4leaf often collaborate and having done Mission Possible myself, I can hand on heart say how valuable it is.
